Some days, homeschooling is great. The kids are happy and eager to learn, the babies are cooperative, there are easy and healthy options for meals, and we're all best friends with each other.

This ideal version is rare, but when it happens, it can be amazing! And you're on the top of the world! And you can achieve anything in life! Everything is wonderful!

The kids wake up on the wrong side of the bed and are cranky about reading. Math problems elicit an hour-long crying session. It's ramen noodles and canned peaches (maybe) for lunch, and everyone is an enemy to each other.

Hopefully, these days are few and far between. Mostly, what I have found is that most of life, including homeschooling, falls somewhere in the middle of this continuum - some days are better (or worse) than others. And many of us look to blogs and testimonials to get encouragement, as well as to know that it's not just our family that has the occasional life-hiccup.

So, I'm going to share the following story in order to add to the (vastly prolific) homeschooling testimonials out there:

Earlier this year (as in January/February timeframe), my girls went through this phase of deciding that math worksheets (and yes, it was really just math) were the most boring things on the planet, and they really did not want to do them. So... just about everyday, one or both of them would have a meltdown about it. And when my kids throw a tantrum, they really release the Kraken.  I mean, there was screaming and crying and whining and moaning for sometimes up to an hour or two.  I would have to banish them to the basement (don't worry - the basement is semi-finished and has all of our books and most of their toys down there, and it's not too shabby of a place, really) because of the noise level - we still had a nap-taking one-year-old.

And before you think that, oh, maybe they couldn't do the math, it was too hard, they needed more help, it's not true.  Because eventually (it may have been an hour or two later), they were somehow magically able to complete the worksheet with no help at all, probably because they finally realized that there would be no fun until it happened. Yes, my kids may be stubborn, but I do believe I am more stubborn than they are.

This went on for weeks.  And it was exhausting. And irritating. And made me want to throw in the towel. My wife eventually shared this with her Mother, who offered a monetary bribe, of sorts.  She sent some cash and everyday there was no crying fit, the child would get $1.00.  

Think about this for a second. Getting money for doing a math sheet with no crying. These kids are LUCKY. 

Well, the first one to get on board was the 6 year old.  Before long she had earned $5.00, and the oldest was incensed - how could her younger sister have money when she did not?  So then, she started changing her ways and eventually got herself some cash too.

So, now it seems like they have gotten out of this habit, for even though some days they still balk about doing their math work, things haven't been quite as overdramatic and insane as before.

Why share this story?  Well, I can't believe that I am the only one that has to deal with stubborn, meltdown-maniac children.  I'm sure many parents do, whether they homeschool or not, and I just wanted to let you poor souls know that you are not alone, and you have my deepest sympathies. But push through - eventually you'll get to the other side and things will be fantastic!

Until it's not again, which will probably be tomorrow. But in the end, this is the way I would have it because... well, they're my daughters and I love them. And I'd be willing to throw away a career or have no career whatsoever for them.

Working at home while homeschooling two kids (with two little ones running around at the same time) provides an interesting schedule for the life of SAHD, who is currently directing a play. So while this is not my typical schedule outside of a play, you can substitute rehearsal with more homeschooling or (cleaning, fixing something, washing dishes, playing with the kids, etc…).

7:00-8:00: I wake up. This time varies greatly throughout the week, but usually it falls in between the hour.

8:00-9:00: Many times this begins before 8:00, but for the purpose of the blog, I’ll put down 8:00. So during this time, I’m getting the 2 big girls and the 2 little ones something to eat while I grab my own cup of coffee, post my blog, check my email and the news, and usually begin the school day. But I’ll leave that for the next hour (for the purpose of the blog).

9:00-9:30: The littlest one usually begins her nap at this time. So while I am getting her to fall asleep, the older girls are beginning school by doing their reading. Meanwhile, the 3-year old is either still eating, running around, bothering the older girls while they start school, stealing the Nook so she can watch Netflix, pouring out cereal on the floor, letting the cat out while she feels how cold it is outside, taking the older girls Legos and taunting them by saying to them, “I’m playing with your stuff,” or… well, you get the drift.

9:30-11:30: During this time, we begin our lessons. Of course, I need another cup of coffee while I do this. I tell the little one to give me the Nook, which she reluctantly does (sometimes). Usually, I have to steal it back and hide it or place it out of reach. We work on lessons while I read the second youngest a book, build blocks, tell her not to pour water out on the floor, ask her why she is now naked, though she was dressed 30-seconds earlier, vacuum the cereal spilled earlier, get her a healthier snack while I steal the chips from her, tell her to get back into the house, or… well, you get the drift.

(SIDENOTE) What I do during this time varies, for my attention is divided by three people. This can last until 12:00 or 12:30, or even 1:00. It is during this time, they play outside as well (sometimes).

11:30-12:30: At this time, the little one wakes up and my wife comes home for lunch. Unfortunately, since we homeschool and are in the middle of a play, we make this a working lunch. We eat while we do school work. It is usually during this time, the girls get their hair done (if they want more than a ponytail) and I get ready for the day.

12:30-1:45: My wife goes back to work and the kids finish (mostly) their lessons. If not, they have to take their work to rehearsal to finish it there.

1:45-2:15: I drop off the two little ones at their grammy’s house while I take the bigger ones to rehearsal. 

2:15-5:00: Rehearsal time. I direct a play I wrote for a group of teenagers (my daughters are in it as well.) Here, my older girls get their drama and theatre arts experience (and finish school if they didn’t finish it at home.) 

5:00-9:00: If it is a writing night, I work during this time by writing or editing, and sending queries to agents, or handling rejections by them. My wife picks up the girls and takes them home. Sometimes, school is finished at home, if we didn’t finish it earlier (or sometimes we save it for the weekend). If it isn’t a working night, I spend the time with my family or finish things at home.

9:00-9:30: I drive home.

9:30-10:00: The last girls are rounded up, prayed with, and kissed goodnight.

10:00-12:00: I usually talk to my wife about the day, about my writing time, about the play and what needs to be accomplished for it, about the kids, or whatever else comes to mind. Usually, if I haven’t eaten dinner, I eat at this time as well. I finally get to unwind and call it day.

12:00-1:00: I go to bed.

All of us live busy lives. This is how my weekday looks (right now)… sort of. Homeschooling is not easy and no two days look exactly alike. But this is a day in the life of a SAHD, one who is trying to get his books published while directing a play.

My wife pointed out to me last night that I use the same excuse for many, many things in my life.  

For example:

Her:  "The house is a wreck."
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her:  "We need to go out on more dates."
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her:  "Oh, no. We're late to church again!"
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her:  "We still haven't sent (insert any family member's name here) a birthday gift yet!"
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her: "Our bank account is precipitously low."
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her:  "Wake up! We just fell asleep through the second episode of 24!" (true story, by the way)
Me:  "We have four kids!"

Her:  "I ran out of flour!"
Me:  "We have four kids!"

I remember the comedian Jim Gaffigan describing what it was like to have four kids, and he said something like, "It's like you're drowning and someone hands you a baby."  

Truer words have never been spoken (if, in fact, they were.  Go ahead and google it - I don't have time.  CUE:  We have four kids!)